*photo from Pinterest
i know it all starts with being an only child. people associate it with being spoiled. in most cases it is not true, think of an only child that is empathetic.
for me it has always been hard being lonely. i always wanted a sibling, mostly so i could share all my sorrows, so it was not even for the right reasons.
in Eastern Europe we usually grew up alone, the generation with the key necklace around their neck, this is how we were called around the 2000s. we spent most of the days outside while our parents were at work. don’t get me wrong, i had a great childhood, a lot of freedom and playfulness yet something was lacking.
i lost my mom when i was 20 and all i could wish for was someone who went through the same thing and could understand exactly what i was going through. i missed having a sibling.
i was 25 and i went through a very bad breakup. i wished someone would come pick me up from my ex-boyfriend’s house and just help me deal with it. i missed having a sibling.
i was 28 and i bought my first apartment. imagine having someone to help with renovations, moving, and being an emotional support while dealing with all this adulthood stuff. i missed having a sibling.
so it’s not all privilege. it’s about having someone there unconditionally, someone who loves you the way family does. i see my friends fight with their siblings but at the end of the day, they show up for each other anyway. that’s the part i never got to have, not the sibling, exactly. the showing up.
i miss something i never had. and i think that might be the strangest kind of missing there is
.
I see you. I understand.